Tuesday, 22 December 2015

STORY: Man Wey Dey Reason…Part 6

The next thing i saw was four men pouring water
on me. I initially tot they were the host of heaven. I
tot i was in heaven. One thing for sure was that
you can’t see bags of cement in heaven.

I wasn’t in
heaven, i was in the store house where bags of
cement were stored.
“wetin bring me come here na? Work don finish?” i
asked at the same time. “work never finish oh, we
think say u don die oh, u fall for where u dey work”
Brainbox said. “but u don fall my hand oh, why u no
tell me say u no get power na” Man said. “why u
dey talk like dis na, shey i be like lazy person?” i
The other guys went to continue working while i
and Brainbox sat eating “bons” we bought from a
snacks seller.
“guy dis kponkpon work make sense oh” i said as
we walked home after work. “when i dey tell u say
kponkpon work na the best work, u no believe” Man
said. “Man wey dey reason!! Man wey dey reason”
I and Brainbox hailed.
It was for sure the best work like Man said.
because i was smiling home with 2400naira, though
the work i did was worth it. And if u multiply 2400
by 30days in a month, then u would aggree with me
that Kponkpon work was more Lucrative than a
Bank job. I promised myself i would put in more
effort to earn as much as Igbakwambo. It was only
a promise.
“Brainbox how much u get sef?” i asked. “Omo na
1200 oh, but tommorow na another day sha” he
responded. If only Tommorow could speak. “oboy i
dey hungry oh” I said yawning. “we go chop na, we
go enter Obele canteen go chop” Man added.
“who be Obele?” Brainbox queried, “no worry when
u reach the canteen u go see who him be” Man
said. “guy all my body dey pain me oh” I
complained. “no worry, e get one strong drug wey
we go buy, if una dey drink dat drug everyday after
una work finish, una no go dey get body pain, the
drug dey give power, nahim i dey drink sef” Man
said. On hearing that, i was happy my “kpokpon
strength” would be enhanced by an elixir. Not
knowing the drug Man was talking about was
almost like c’ocaine, it was killing.
Obele!!The only thing i knew about Obele was that
Obele meant Small in English. I never knew the
person we would meet at the Canteen would be
small but mighty.
“Obele give me indomie and Egg, and u go make
custard for me sef, u go put enof milk for the
custard oh, so the blood wey don comot for my
body as i dey work go come back” Man said as we
entered Obele canteen. “Obele which soup una
cook?” i asked. “u dey mad? Dis place be like
where dem dey sell soup?” Obele cursed. “see dis
small pekin oh, na me u dey tell say i dey mad? I
be ur mate?” i said. “i be like small pekin for ur
eye? na ur papa be small pekin” Obele cursed. I
was getting mad at the way Obele was insulting
me. I never believed Children could be that rude. It
was driving me crazy.
I stood up and said, “na one hand i go take finish u
oh, ur mate dey primary sch, u dey here, who be ur
Oga sef?”. Man stood up, came close to me and
whispered to my ears saying; “guy na him be the
main Obele oh, him no get Oga oh, na him get dis
canteen oh”. I laughed out loud and said, “how dis
small short guy go get dis kin big canteen”. I tot he
wasn’t the main Obele, i tot there was another
Obele inside. “na me u dey call short guy?” Obele
yelled, keeping his guard and ready to fight. “na me
u wan fight? una no get old man for una Village
abi?” i yelled keeping my guard also.
“Flow see small pekin wey u wan fight, u no dey
shame oh” i said in my mind. It was as if Man
heard what i said, he stood up, came close to me
and whispered to my ears: “Flow that Obele no be
small pekin oh, him just be like Aki and PawPaw
Wey dey act film, na Married man him be oh”. I just
wanted to beat the hell out of Obele so i didn’t
believe what Man told me. I didn’t believe Obele
was a Pigmy.
“i go beat u oh, i go blow ur face oh” Obele yelled.
“u wey short like dis, how ur hand go take reach
my face?” i tot. I never knew that even if his hands
couldn’t get to my face, there was somewhere it
could get to.
My d’ick.
He grabbed my d’ick with so much fury. I cried out.
I pleaded with him. I even told him i was sorry, yet
he still held my d’ick so tight. I heard a sound as if
something had burst. I tot my s’crotum had burst.
“Man make una beg for me na, make him no cut
my p’rick oh” i cried out.
Man and Brainbox came to my rescue saying;
“Obele abeg leave him p’rick na!! Obele abeg no
cut him p’rick!! Him no go call u small pekin
again!!”. “i dey mad wey i go call you small pekin? u
be big pekin oh!!!” i cried out.
To Be Continued…
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