Saturday, 26 December 2015

STORY: Man Wey Dey Reason…Part 10

Next morning, as early as 8am man woke me up.
And he told me we should start preparing for work.
I woke Brainbox also. The others were still
sleeping.
“we no go chop before we go?” Brainbox asked.
“no worry we go chop vegetable soup for Mama
Calabar place” Man responded. “who be Mama
calabar?” Brainbox asked. “when we reach there u
go see her” Man answered(his usual way of
answering such question).
Why i so much liked Mama Calabar canteen was
because the place was neat. Not only that,
because that was the canteen most kponkpon
workers ate their breakfast. “mehn! Calabar women
sabi cook oh, i must marry Calabar woman oh” i
concluded as i munched my kingsize meat.
Mama Calabar canteen wasn’t far from our “place
of work”, so we walked down gulping our sachet
water, like the ghetto boys we were.
“e get one old man wey i want make we go see,
him name na Old solja, nahim be security man for
dis site for night, na him hand key to where dem
dey put cement dey dey, but as him no dey around
dat yesterday him give me the key day before
yesterday make i hold am, but him call me dis
morning say him don come back, so make we go
greet am because that man dey help me well well,
na him house i dey go drink water sometimes sef,
him house no far from here” Man explained.
“Old Solja good morning” we chorused as we got to
the shanty house. “unu morning” he responded.
“unu come to work?” Old Solja asked, “yes Sir” Man
answered. “unu Madam never come?” he asked
again, “yes sir, she never come, so we say make
we come greet you na” Man responded. “unu don
try as unu come, make unu sidon na” Old Solja said
offering us seat. I wondered why he replaced “una”
with “unu”. Infact i lost count of how many times
he mentioned the word “unu” for the five minutes
we stood in front of his house. The “unu” was
becoming a rhyme. “no Old Solja, no worry we go
soon go sef, our Madam go soon come, this na my
two friends, this one name na Flow, dis one name
na Brainbox, i come show dem to you” Man added.
“ok unu don dey go?” Old solja asked, “we don dey
go sir” our spokesMAN responded. “únú n’gbàmbo”
Old solja mentioned the word “unu” again but this
time in Ibo.
Work started earlier that morning.
“Brainbox how come u dey three bags and i still
dey two bags na?” i inquired. “wetin u call me, no
be Brainbox? Ehnn i use my brain dey work na. U
dey use power, me i dey use brain nahim make”
Brainbox responded. “Flow come with me to carry
more bags of cement from the Cement store”
Madam Ifeoma ordered.
As i walked behind her, i continously gazed at her
Television shaped Ikebe, making my d’ick to rise.
My d’ick bulged out of my working trouser forming
a mountainous culve.
We got there, she entered the store and showed
me the bags of cement i was to carry. I carried it.
My d’ick was still as hard as a rock, it seemed she
saw my standing d’ick so she said, “what is this?”
pointing to the direction of my d’ick. “na my
Chiarman, the thing no dey respect himself, na
wetin my Papa give me, shebi u sef get wetin ur
Mama give u for ur back?” i almost said.
She wasn’t actually pointing at my d’ick, she was
pointing to a bag of cement that has torn and the
cement was pouring out. I told her i would come
back to carry that particular bag for us to make us
of its content.
I moved close to the door and Madam Ifeoma was
still standing at the door with her “big nyash”
facing me, she couldn’t even hear the “excuse me”
i was saying. “abi dis woman want make i use my
p’rick nak her nyash? My p’rick go break be that
oh” i tot. “Excuse me!” i yelled, oweing to the fact
that the cement on my head was almost breaking
my neck bone. She finally gave way.
As i finished carrying 12bags of cement from the
store to the site my neck failed me, i was walking
like a robot, “so una go dey here dey work, i go go
carry cement wey una go take work abi? Na Ojoro
oh” i almost said.
Work ended by 5pm, i mixed four bags of rice and
beans, Brainbox mixed Six, Igbakwambo and
Ochagbuoria mixed countless bags.
“oboy i dey hungry oh” I said. “i go carry una go
Soroagwa place go chop Akpu and Ofe Oha” Man
said. “who be Soroagwa na?” Brainbox inquired. “no
worry when we reach there u go see am” Man
answered(his usually way).
Man had a place to satisfy every of his urge,
ranging from; Obele place to Paapa place to Mama
Calabar place and Now to Soroagwa place, who
knows where next, maybe Heaven place?
The only thing i could tell was that Soroagwa in Ibo
means “follow this attitude”. If only time could
speak, it could have told me what lies ahead at
Soroagwa Canteen.
To be continued...

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